Ok, maybe they haven't attacked, but it feels like. It's been quite a few years since DW's tics have been debilitating. It's been quite a few years since anyone's flat out noticed his tics period! He's always ticcing, but with such short bursts and while he's moving, no one seemed to notice. Not even when they were obvious to me.
These last few months though, as his medications that have worked great for all sorts of his behaviors have begun to work less and less. Which has prompted some needed, but dreaded medication changes. It's also brought back the upswing of tics that I've not seen in some years.
Which is neither here nor there for me, but he's at that age now where he wants to be like everyone else, he's in the public more, etc. Which if you're a tic'er can be a hard thing. I don't have TS, but if in the room with someone I don't know who tics a lot and I'm uncomfortable, I find myself ticcing in response, if that makes any sort of sense. The point is that those who don't tic, notice those that do.
So, imagine my dismay over my mother-in-law commenting about how much he was pulling at his collar. Then commenting about how he was going to stretch it out. Then how it was going to wreck his shirt...and on and on.
Follow that by his half-brother, who is here for Christmas vacation, sitting at the table with DW turning to his father and asking his father! Why is he rocking the chair? Why is he touching everything with both hands? Why is he moving his arms like that? Why is he pulling on his shirt? Is that snort still a tic? I mean he's talking about his brother as if he's not even in the room with him! I corrected that and told him he just needs to ask DW and then drop it. DW has no problem saying "it's a tic" or "I have Tourette Syndrome".
As a mom, I fully expect to educate the public on a great many things with my boys, I just don't expect to have to continually refresh the family's memory. It's a tad frustrating. Especially when they can see that certain tics are so frustrating for him and he's bothered enough by them to start a sentence over and over and over until he can get through it without that tic. Or when he's crying because he's grunted so much he's made himself hoarse and can't actually grunt!
Here's the thing I've taken to saying, if they're not bothering him too much, than they shouldn't bother you. It's not your body, your brain or you throat doing it. So, just assume anything that he's repeatedly doing is a tic and it's a part of him and move on! A bit brash,I know, but some days brash is needed!
I hope everyone has a tic-tacular New Year!
Monday, December 30, 2013
Elopement and NOT the Marrying Kind!
I write in here sporadically now. I do try to keep more time to do this, but at the end of the day...I don't know, I'm exhausted!
It's hard to stay awake when your youngest child (who I swear is bent on world domination) is awake every morning lately at no latter than 4 a.m.!
I don't know if anyone reads this blog or not anymore since I quit writing so frequently, but I decided to share this here in the hopes that it may spare anyone else the scare that I went through last week.
Sensory kiddos and Autism kiddos have a tendency to bolt. While one will run from an offending sensory stimuli, the autism kid my take off for some random reason known only to them and ALSO to avoid the overstimulation that some offending sensory thing has caused them. I experienced the SPD running with DW when he was little. In fact, one time he tried to throw himself off of the moving train at the zoo because of a noise the joints were making!
I'd never really experienced the autism running off, or as it known in Autism circles, elopement, before until last week. I didn't see all that happened with my son, but what was relayed to me dropped me to my knees and took my breath clean out of me.
After his med check at his doctor's office, we were leaving the room and JD squeezed between big brother and I in the hallway and then made a mad dash for the waiting room. I turned for a brief second to acknowledge what his doc had said to me and when I turned back he was out of the hallway. Now, I should mention that JD has gotten ahead of a few times and he simply plays hide and seek in the waiting room. This was not that day though. His brother and I got out into the waiting room and he was nowhere to be found!
I should also mention that his doctor's office is in a hospital. Not a large one really, but it is long (laid out in a ranch style kind of way). It is also, what amounts to maybe a small block away from a major street. I say it's a highway, but it's official designation is "street". It is used my students going to a large highschool down the street, people going to and from work, etc. It is a pretty busy street.
Anyway, his brother and I take off into the hospital, separating with me going one way and DW going another. At my end, the door we came in, I step outside, call his name and look for him. After a minute or so, I don't see him and don't want DW to panic if he can't find me, so I head back in. Neither of us can find him. We meet back in the middle and let the staff know that we're looking for him. We both head toward the area where we came in, hoping he's just hiding really well there.
A young lady sees my panicked face and tells us that she saw a young child in a black shirt run out of the front doors!! I run out after him, again calling his name and beating myself up for not staying outside the first time. I see an older lady who thankfully has a death grip on him waving at me from the other end of the parking lot! He comes running to me, she's yelling at me, but what she said, I have no idea. The head of the staff comes out to make sure he's found me alright. I'm in tears and he's chipper as anything.
As I go to get him in the car, tears already running down my face. Another mom comes up to me to tell me what happened. Apparently several people where out there trying to get him to come to them. He was so busy looking for something, he wouldn't stop or acknowledge them in any fashion. At one point, the lady who'd gotten a hold of him, was driving a transportation van and almost hit him!!! As if I wasn't crying enough at that point...all I could now picture was my tiny little son and this HUGE van face to face. This mother said, that all the parents in the parking lot were angry with JD's mom up until that point. When the van almost hit him, he laughed and kept running. It was then that they knew he "wasn't right". To make matters worse, all he could tell them was what his name was and not even his last name. Which I KNOW he knows, but welcome to the world of Autism.
It scared me to my core and made me angry at myself. I knew he was a runner, but I'd become so complacent. No more, there are better locks on my doors, I've bought a zipper pull that identifies him as autistic and I've order a tag for his shoes as well, that will hold contact info in case he gets away from me again.
On a side note and a look into his world: When I asked him what he ran outside for, he didn't answer right away. I just kept casually asking him throughout the day. He finally answered: 111. I was perplexed for a while until I realized that he is OBSESSED with numbers and he was looking for our license plate! So, as with all autism mommas, I planned for future elopement moments and I adorned out car with various things that make it stand out for him. Things he loves, things he recognizes and I do so from all angles. So, that no matter what angle he comes at the car, he'll notice it and hopefully stay put next to it.
PLEASE take this message to heart. Pass it on, let everyone know that this happens to ASD kiddos. That we can all do something to help. There are new things coming out all the time, from those smarthpone scanning bracelets, to new GPS ways to track down a child.
We don't have project lifesaver in our county. The next county over does though. Still, if you can afford it there are other GPS things you can do for your child. Even if you can't afford a GPS set up, there are so many things that you can to help keep your kiddos safe. Visit the following sites to get more information:
http://www.autismsafety.org/
http://www.awaare.org/ (The Big Red Safety Box)
http://www.projectlifesaver.org/
http://www.autismriskmanagement.com/
And most importantly, if you see a child out on their own, even if they won't let you come near please do something. So many could be returned home safely if the public would step in and help.
It's hard to stay awake when your youngest child (who I swear is bent on world domination) is awake every morning lately at no latter than 4 a.m.!
I don't know if anyone reads this blog or not anymore since I quit writing so frequently, but I decided to share this here in the hopes that it may spare anyone else the scare that I went through last week.
Sensory kiddos and Autism kiddos have a tendency to bolt. While one will run from an offending sensory stimuli, the autism kid my take off for some random reason known only to them and ALSO to avoid the overstimulation that some offending sensory thing has caused them. I experienced the SPD running with DW when he was little. In fact, one time he tried to throw himself off of the moving train at the zoo because of a noise the joints were making!
I'd never really experienced the autism running off, or as it known in Autism circles, elopement, before until last week. I didn't see all that happened with my son, but what was relayed to me dropped me to my knees and took my breath clean out of me.
After his med check at his doctor's office, we were leaving the room and JD squeezed between big brother and I in the hallway and then made a mad dash for the waiting room. I turned for a brief second to acknowledge what his doc had said to me and when I turned back he was out of the hallway. Now, I should mention that JD has gotten ahead of a few times and he simply plays hide and seek in the waiting room. This was not that day though. His brother and I got out into the waiting room and he was nowhere to be found!
I should also mention that his doctor's office is in a hospital. Not a large one really, but it is long (laid out in a ranch style kind of way). It is also, what amounts to maybe a small block away from a major street. I say it's a highway, but it's official designation is "street". It is used my students going to a large highschool down the street, people going to and from work, etc. It is a pretty busy street.
Anyway, his brother and I take off into the hospital, separating with me going one way and DW going another. At my end, the door we came in, I step outside, call his name and look for him. After a minute or so, I don't see him and don't want DW to panic if he can't find me, so I head back in. Neither of us can find him. We meet back in the middle and let the staff know that we're looking for him. We both head toward the area where we came in, hoping he's just hiding really well there.
A young lady sees my panicked face and tells us that she saw a young child in a black shirt run out of the front doors!! I run out after him, again calling his name and beating myself up for not staying outside the first time. I see an older lady who thankfully has a death grip on him waving at me from the other end of the parking lot! He comes running to me, she's yelling at me, but what she said, I have no idea. The head of the staff comes out to make sure he's found me alright. I'm in tears and he's chipper as anything.
As I go to get him in the car, tears already running down my face. Another mom comes up to me to tell me what happened. Apparently several people where out there trying to get him to come to them. He was so busy looking for something, he wouldn't stop or acknowledge them in any fashion. At one point, the lady who'd gotten a hold of him, was driving a transportation van and almost hit him!!! As if I wasn't crying enough at that point...all I could now picture was my tiny little son and this HUGE van face to face. This mother said, that all the parents in the parking lot were angry with JD's mom up until that point. When the van almost hit him, he laughed and kept running. It was then that they knew he "wasn't right". To make matters worse, all he could tell them was what his name was and not even his last name. Which I KNOW he knows, but welcome to the world of Autism.
It scared me to my core and made me angry at myself. I knew he was a runner, but I'd become so complacent. No more, there are better locks on my doors, I've bought a zipper pull that identifies him as autistic and I've order a tag for his shoes as well, that will hold contact info in case he gets away from me again.
On a side note and a look into his world: When I asked him what he ran outside for, he didn't answer right away. I just kept casually asking him throughout the day. He finally answered: 111. I was perplexed for a while until I realized that he is OBSESSED with numbers and he was looking for our license plate! So, as with all autism mommas, I planned for future elopement moments and I adorned out car with various things that make it stand out for him. Things he loves, things he recognizes and I do so from all angles. So, that no matter what angle he comes at the car, he'll notice it and hopefully stay put next to it.
PLEASE take this message to heart. Pass it on, let everyone know that this happens to ASD kiddos. That we can all do something to help. There are new things coming out all the time, from those smarthpone scanning bracelets, to new GPS ways to track down a child.
We don't have project lifesaver in our county. The next county over does though. Still, if you can afford it there are other GPS things you can do for your child. Even if you can't afford a GPS set up, there are so many things that you can to help keep your kiddos safe. Visit the following sites to get more information:
http://www.autismsafety.org/
http://www.awaare.org/ (The Big Red Safety Box)
http://www.projectlifesaver.org/
http://www.autismriskmanagement.com/
And most importantly, if you see a child out on their own, even if they won't let you come near please do something. So many could be returned home safely if the public would step in and help.
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